A Higher Loyalty

I’m not really into politics.

I mean some of my friends are and I respect that. I like doing stuff like debating for better causes, fighting for my claim, I mean I am more of a get it done and make it happen kinda girl. But when it comes to the branches of government and legislation’s and a bunch of other truckloads of things I don’t understand, are put together into one thing my brain just oozes and wants to explode. I mean I understand what I need to understand but its just so

C O N F U S L I N G

(Yeah I made up that word.)

It can either be a thorn to your side or your best friend. Or you just really don’t care. Politics is the driving force for a lot of countries besides the people themselves. It is an important part of the places we live in and how society is run or is being run. The earliest politicians( people from the 17 and 1800s )such as the senators of each state or the treasury or Secretary of State.

Recently I read this book by James Comey, now I assume that you may or may not have been acquainted with this name and the title this man holds. He was he former FBI director before he was fired by Mr. Trump and told to resign as of May 2017. He was the 7th director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation since 2013 since 2013. However, before he was appointed FBI director, he was the U.S. deputy attorney general with the authority of President George W. Bush

My dad seems to have a lot of respect for him and I wanted to learn more about this man who seemed to be on a lot of news lately. One night my dad had gone to Costco to purchase our groceries and stuff. Now Costco isn’t only about food I mean it sells furniture and other stuff too but anytime I go I am always attracted like a fly towards a lamplight when I see that long barricade with stacks with piles of books. Call me spoiled if you want but it seems that every time I go, nowadays I always leave with some book in my hands. I wasn’t surprised when my dad walked into the door that night, back from Costco with a book in hand. I am so grateful for my parents because they have to deal with my ridiculous obsession with books and if scientists ever did a testing on me to see how irrationally annoying I can be, I bet the results would go off the charts.

Anyway I thanked my dad and stared at the deep navy blue color of the soft book jacket. The words A Higher Loyalty written boldly in silver embellishments. I appreciated the simplicity of the cover but its ability to still stay informative in its title. Literally.

Before I continue on I would like to say somethings:

  • The things I say about what is going on in the country currently, is not my entire opinion
  • I am not on anybodies side when it comes to politics
  • I simply read the book to my own content

That night after dinner I sat on my bed, the fan turned on fluttering the crisp pages. I read on and on for at least a day or two, giving my dad insight on what I had read so far. James Comeys story is a whirlwind of morales, clean transitions from each situation described, at the same time the book slowly conversing into a kind of sad, dampening realization that this countries government is slowly turning into a democracy where loyalty is demanded, truth isn’t believed, and dishonesty is a norm of a twisted sort.

Quite distressing is it not?

The book starts out with an authors note and an intro,  both in which I found interesting and wonderful pieces of self thought, of life around us. But what really was intriguing was the first line of the first chapter in the book:

“THE LIFE BEGINS with a lie.”

What an interesting way to start a book was it not? What did he mean by that? Were our lives defined by the lies of others? Is loyalty a mythical thing of the past? Why had he emphasized the first three words, leaving the other three de-emphasized? Was that to create a simple statement? To have a recreational purpose for the book and its furthermore contents? These questions still pick at the edges of my  brain and I have put more thought into this more than most of the things that sticked out to me in the book.

The book starts with his years of when he was the U.S. Deputy General at the time of President George W. Bush. He describes the different scandals and situations he had to bring justice to. But what I found most interesting in his writings, were the ways he maneuvered the way he described the people he worked with, including the three different presidents mentioned in the book in each order and his colleagues. He describes the way they made him feel and how comfortable he felt around them. All this his mental thoughts at the time.

If you read carefully, with each transition of presidents it shows the same line of what he is describing, such as height, their stature, their attitude and logic, work ethic, and how comfortable he felt around them. But what I found super duper hilarious was this:

“Trump’s face appeared slightly orange, with bright half-moons under his eyes where I assumed he place small tanning goggles, and impressively coiffed, bright blond hair, which upon close inspection looked to be all his.’’

0~0

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *snort* *gasp* HAHA *wheeze* HE ACTUALLY CALLED THE PRESIDENT       O R A N G E

ORANGE

Oh dear gods why.

I don’t think I can describe everything he wrote in the book but one thing I do want to say is that this book is one of few books by high staturized adults THAT I ACTUALLY UNDERSTOOD OH MY GOODNESS YES! I respect him even more, souley because I was able to understand almost everything he was talking about in the book. I’m sorry I couldn’t write more about this book but the thing is there is so much to describe and its O V E R W H E L M I N G.

See kids I can be

E D G Y

WHOO

No, no I am not actually,  forget I said that. Sowwy that was weird.

Hehe okie. MOVING ON. I really hope you guys have the opportunity to read this book because I think it has so many morales that you just need to have in your life but he makes those morales hidden. You have to find the meaning of the whole book before finding out the lesson he is trying to teach.

Welp. Thats uh, all I got for you guys today. I hope you enjoyed and so yeah. Bye!

Related image

I am an artist and a dreamer. Therefore I have unrealistic expectations and I live in a fantasy world in my head. Thank you for understanding.

So recently I have been working on so much art on my iPad AND on paper. Its nonstop really, I mean artists block is non existent in my head now and the ideas just keep coming in my head like river water seeping into the cracks of wood. My friends and family are so supportive and honestly I feel so overwhelmed by the praise everyone has given me for everything I do. I mean writing, music, art, these I believe anyone can do it if they set their mind to. I’m not any different from anyone else. I had my chance.

I took it.

Therefore I present you all the FINISHED art I have done in the past couple weeks or so. Also I will show comparisons between old art the new art I have made so you guys can kinda see a difference in my old and new art styles and improvements. So without further adieu I present: Uum art. Yeah

So this piece was of Newt Scamander, one of the main characters in the new movie series by J.K. Rowling. I love this characters because he truly lives up to the Hufflepuff name. Hufflepuff is the Hogwarts house representing loyalty, hard working, patience, dedication, and of course aptitude. The love he has towards all magical creatures and beasts is beautiful and Eddie Redmayne suits Newt’ s character so perfectly. I can’t imagine anyone else play Newt other than him. Another thing I love about this character is that he is a dedicated writer. In the wizarding world, he was the author of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find them and is currently a required textbook to have in your possession at Hogwarts. So yeah I just had to draw him. MAY I REMIND YOU I AM OVER THE TOP FLIPPING EXCITED BECAUSE THE NEXT FANTASTIC BEAST MOVIE IS COMING CALLED THE CRIMES OF GRINDELWALD AND I AM SO FLIPPING EXCITED I COULD BURST INTO FLAMES AND THEN SWIM INTO AN OCEAN.

of course i won’t do that I mean I’m not stupid. Right?

NEXT DRAWING!

So this was a drawing I did quite a while ago- of myself. Now I know I know it doesn’t really look like me(if you know what I look like of course)but I tried to incorporate the key elements like my uncontrollable hair, the constant furrow of my eyebrows, small nose and wide smile. In the background I wrote everything I love in my life and am impassioned towards. Now here is one I had done recently as an update drawing to put on my About Me page:

I actually did put my signature in the picture but I think I made it too dark because its hidden in the bottom of the shirt but like I said, super dark. Anyway I made this a bit simpler and the shirt in the piece is actually a sweater I have and wear. Yeah, just a little tidbit. Anyway I think this is a bit better than my previous attempt at drawing myself. Again it does not exactly look like me but its the small things that count right?

alright next drawing…..

So if you do not recognize this character, she is Gamora from Guardians of the Galaxy. She is one of my ultimate favorite Marvel characters(aside from Doctor Strange, no one can top Doctor Strange). I am actually kinda proud of this one because it looks really similar to the actual character:

Image result for gamora
Sure it isn’t exactly like her but I tried my best with my current style and I think I did pretty decent considering the fact that it is the first time I have ever drawn her but I think I could do better. Anyway, I think I have improved A LOT ever since I first started with my iPad. So yeah thanks for listening.
Later Guys!

Hey mom.

When I was little I would always ask my parents why they named me- Kanmani. An exotic name is it not? No one at school had such a name, so why me? My little child’s brain was a thing of callow and naive thoughts of wonder at everything in sight. Therefore giving me the constant consent that such questions like these must be answered. My mother didn’t hesitate to answer as I stared with an anxious widening of my eyes. She looked me directly in the eyes and said:

When you were born you and you father looked down at you, our first daughter and thought how precious you are to us. This tiny human laying in my arms will be the star in our solar system. Your fragile and angelic. Kanmani means precious like the eye. You are so much like that Kanmani. Remember that.

I have never forgotten those words, sure my parents may have but there is no way I could. Its stamped in my head, every time I feel like a failure I think of those words because my mother, my best friend, she said those to me. That has been imprinted in my head, those words are what have only made a quarter of who I am. My mom, oh my gosh this amazing, incredible human being. She is this loving, generous, strong, soul, this umbra. She can make anyone in her presence feel like the most carefree and loved spirit in the world. She can walk with the entire universe on her shoulders and make it look like she has delicate wings on her back. Without my mom I wouldn’t have the motivation to do what I do now.

Another thing about my mom is that she has this aura around her like her own atmospheric bubble. The instant you enter it you’re being washed by love and graciousness. If she hugs you the effect from that embrace will still leave and impression on you long after her arms have left your body. If you guys do not remember, I made a post last year, in February about my mom and someone commented on that post saying that my mom is a kind person and they still remember being hugged by her. A hug with so much love. They also said I was very lucky to have her as a mom.

Indeed I am.

A lot of people say that I have the looks of my father, from the curve of my jawline down to the way I smile. But a handful of people say I look like my mom. But alas, looks are the most deceiving. My mom is smart in every situation, she isn’t awkward or hesitant. She is an amazing cook and has the willpower of a thousand forests and mountains. She is graceful and adored and thinks before acting. She is smart and wise. She is so calm and unique in the best way possible and has the beauty patience of a willow tree.

I on the other hand am probably the most awkward person alive and the only thing I can make in the kitchen is cereal and toast. I cant even be sure about my own willpower and I’m as graceful as an oaf. I don’t think before my actions and I not that smart most of the time and have the wisdom of a goldfish cracker.

But the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

My mom makes me feel like I can do anything and I don’t love another female more than I love her and my sister. I believe in love at first sight because the first thing I saw when I was born was her. My mother believes in me more than I believe in myself. Happy Mothers Day  everyone, of and before I sign off I need to do something;

Here is a letter to you mom:

Dearest mother.

I will love you as long as the waves crash on the shores of the beach,

as long as the stars shine,

the sun rises,

the rain falls,

the flowers unfurl,

the winds blow,

the moon glows,

and wolves howl to the sky.

Adieu My Best of Love,

Kanmani